Monday, June 12, 2006

numb...

don't ask me how do i feel now... what i can tell about my feeling now is, NUMB... totally NUMB!! feeling like lost! really! don't ask me why do i feel numb... i have nothing to tell... because i have no mood to tell now, maybe few days later i will get better...
this morning, i was expecting messages from you, from 7am, i waited until 10am... i really hate to admit, but i have to, we are no more friends... we will not hear any ups and downs from each other anymore... i also have place to vomit and spread all my bad emotions... i lost a best ear to listen to my craps... i lost a caring and loving friend... i have no more right to talk to you either... you will not care how am i today... i feel like everything, everything is now a mess... i need you to organise me, to bug me, to mumble me, to scold me stupid and more... but now it's all impossible... IMPOSSIBLE!!
i cried, i hated, i scolded, i begged, i yelled and more, but still, you will not come back to me anymore... you will just go on without me, bugging around you, you may feel released... but for me, i feel bad... because i need someone to mumble me all the time for what i do... but now no more... so bad...

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